Marriage Counseling - Not Always The Best Way To Save Your Marriage!
Do you remember when Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston were the media golden couple? Do you remember how they went to marriage counseling, even before they had problems in their marriage? And yet, it didn’t solve everything, because we know that Brad is now married to Angelina Jolie. If you are trying to save your marriage, then this information may apply to you, too.
Marriage Counseling - It’s A Business.
In the western world, marriage counseling takes the place of friends and neighbours, maybe church leaders or even family doctors. Marriage compatibility was everyones concern. But does this make them the answer to all a persons prayers when it comes to looking at marriages? No, I don’t think so.
Remember, ultimately marriage counsellors are running a business. Their priority is not always the same as yours, to save your marriage. They charge you your $100 per hour and they talk to you about your childhood, how you
related to your parents, etc, etc. They get to know you and what makes you tick.
$100 per hour - How Many Hours?
Then as time goes by and they gradually unravel your past they then see the links between your behaviours now and your experiences in the past. How long do you think that will take at $100 per hour?
Put it this way - if you could charge people $100 per hour how long would it take you?
Check Their Priority
Another aspect of counselling, particularly marriage counseling, is sometimes clients get emotionally attached to their counsellor.This would not be condusive to saving a marriage!
Many people have their own belief systems, especially regarding emotive subjects like abortion, marriage, divorce etc. Some counsellors actually encourage their clients to get a divorce. Of course that benefits them financially because there are more relationships to go round then!
Questions You Should Ask
I am not claiming all counsellors are the same, they do not all behave in an underhand manner. I have met counsellors who have done a fantastic job.
But I would suggest that you make sure that:
* Your counsellor has good references - you can check that they have
experiences helping couples save their relationships.
* You agree a set amount of sessions, and you make sure that agreement is
stuck to. Beware when the counsellor says: “We have made good progress,
let’s have another ten sessions.”
* You make sure that the counsellor is coming from a belief system that is
similar to your own. If your priority is to save your marriage, make sure that
is the priority of your counsellor also.
If you want to avoid the pitfalls of marriage counseling, but you want to save your marriage, then why not consider this?
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